A description is just that: describing something, making abundant use of adjectives in the process. What is detail? Detail is how you describe something, using one vivid noun instead of a hundred colorful adjectives. The details you include (or exclude) make a huge difference in how something is portrayed. Now, anyone can use details like color, shape, general layout of a room, etc. A true writer, however, ignores all that unless it's exceedingly relevant. Instead, a writer focuses on the little things that stand out.
So, rather than noting idly that the walls are painted blue, a writer points out the chipped paint, the water-warped ceiling, and the spot on the wall that's darker than everything else where, until recently, a poster or picture hung. And the sunburn line on the back of his neck warrant more mention than red hair and tan skin.
Are you seeing the difference yet? I know I am, and I also know this particular point is something I really need to work on. You see, most of my descriptions pathetically look something like this:
Her brown hair was pulled into a half-ponytail with loose bangs framing her face. Powder was brushed across her nose. Her turquoise tank top was tucked into denim shorts and cowboy boots covered her feet.
Short, flowery, but vague and oh so dull. What is it about this character that they merited an entire paragraph? Or is the writer just filling space and killing time? What if it said this:
She smacked her gum loudly, and pink bits of it stuck in her tangled ponytail. One strap of her tank top was slipping off her shoulder and one side was untucked. Scuffed-up cowboy boots thudded on the tile as she walked by, leaving a trail of dried mud in her wake.
or this:
Despite the wind, not a single strand of hair was out of place. Lip gloss shimmered on perfect pink lips. Her rhinestoned tank top was ironed to perfection and there was scarcely a crease in her shorts. Polished, top-of-the-line cowboy boots adorned her dainty feet.
Can you see it now? Same outfit, same hairstyle, same shoes (excuse the cowboy boots; I'm from Texas). But the details paint a very different picture. The first: a stereotypical nineties rebel. The second: Miss Prom Queen. Pretty straightforward, right? But there's still the question of what it is about this character that makes them worth their space on the page. What if there was just one significant detail added in? Like this:
Her tank top, so carelessly worn, was still the latest fashion, and there was not a spot or a tear on it.
Or:
Half the rhinestones on her perfectly ironed tank top were missing.
Now we have some character depth. The one we thought was a rebel...might still be one, but she's still very well off, and thus we defy the stereotype. The other now has some contradictions going for her that the reader wants to understand.
Have I made my point yet? I hope so. When choosing your details, though, don't just arbitrarily pick something to point out. By all means, name the brand of jeans your character is wearing, or the make and model of the car that just whizzed by out the bedroom window. But make it mean something, and mean something important. Wrangler and Corduroy tell you something very different about a character. And a fancy 2016 Lamborghini versus a '95 Ford truck are virtually opposites, and if that car reappears it could be important to the plot somehow. Otherwise it will be immediately forgotten and you might as well not have put it there in the first place.
Every word you put down on paper (or type into your word processor, as the case may be) has to be meaningful to the story in some way. Otherwise you'd be better off leaving it out. And be consistent, too; if you mention someone has a neon green cast when he's first introduced as a talking point, you'd better make sure he's sitting out in gym class in the next scene, cast glinting in the artificial lights. But that brings up a whole different issue.
No comments:
Post a Comment